Chapter 31: Just for tonight..

March 11, 2017

Assalammualaikum..


If I had the power to control the time.. 
Or just if, time travel do exist.. 
All I want to do is just to go back to the past..
And fix from the moment where everything goes wrong..

Or most probably, 
It would be the best if I go back to the past..
Where everything started.. 
And prevent it from happening.. 
So that no feelings get messed up.. 

Sometimes I just wonder..
How would my life be if you're still around...
Would I be at this place now..?
Or would I be able to complete what am I was hope to be..?

Because all of the while, 
You used to be the strength..
The one whom trusted by my family to deal with me..
As they belief you could influence me the most..
Well.. They're right after all...

Both of us used to be in pain.. 
And I belief, nothing bothers you now..
You might even be happier than you use to be..
While here I am, pretending like nothing about you bothers me anymore.. 

But if I need to be honest with myself..
sometimes I wonder..
Am I the only person whom still haven't fully heal? 
Because right now, my mind is totally filled by you..

Hopefully,
Just for tonight, 
Allah send you this message..
That here I am, still missing you.. 

I'm sorry for this random stake of mind.. I'm not in my right mind and I'm just feeling to write.. I'm sorry if reading this made you uncomfortable.. Insya-Allah, I would be back at the right state on my next post..  






42 comments

  1. It's okay dear. Tulislah apa sahaja yang mampu legakan hati kita.

    Kadang-kadang rasa yang menyinggah tu bukan kerana kita rindu, cuma teringat. Find your happiness. All the best!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks cik mai.. Tula.. Trying hard to find one.. hehe..

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    2. Agree with this. Sometimes we can't control the thought, it can come suddenly. Maybe there is something we encounter that can trigger the memory.

      hanisamanina.com

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    3. Couldn't agree more.. haha.. :3

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  2. Semoga cepat sembuh dari terluka ya... sedih baca sajak ni... :-(

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    Replies
    1. Insya-Allah akan sembuh.. hee.. Tulis apa yang terlintas je masa nie..

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  3. Be strong dear. Dealing with our feeling is not easy. But, inshaAllah you can do it!

    *girls hug*

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    Replies
    1. Thanks ana.. It's really hard to control but alhamdulillah, getting better.. :D

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  4. Whatever it is my dear, May Allah ease everything :)

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  5. Dont be sad my friend. Nangis sepuasnya jika itu mampu buat kamu kuat dan esok bangkit terus dari kesedihan tu k :)

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    Replies
    1. I'm not sad anymore, thanks to you.. hehe.. :x

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  6. Whatever happened, please be strong and keep stronger. Stay smile and be happy dear ❤

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    Replies
    1. Will do sis.. Thank you soo much... <3

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  7. We can't go back to the past,
    but we definitely could make our tomorrow better,
    Don't waste your time living in the past,
    we can fix it!

    don't be sad :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm not living in the past but just reminiscing it sometimes.. Well I'm not sad anymore, thanks to you guys.. :D

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    2. Ahhhhh sorry for the wrong choice of word. Glad to know that you're no longer sad. Yeay.

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  8. jom guna laci ajaib doraemon utk pergi ke masa lalu 😄 andai dapat ku undurkan putaran dunia, ingin ku ubah semula... eh ehhh, ternyanyi plak 😂 apapun, stay strong... hati mesti sado 💪💪💪

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    Replies
    1. Kalau la doraemon itu wujud.. hahaha... Maceh awak.. XD

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  9. This is beautiful. Hurtfully true but still beautiful. I hope I can read ones sounded happier.

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    Replies
    1. haha.. My mind would literally works like this only when I'm messed up.. But who knows if I could come out with a happy one, kan?

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  10. i have been in this situation before, just like you. I cried a lot that night lol and what my friends told me, same like mai said in her comment, "Kadang-kadang rasa yang menyinggah tu bukan kerana kita rindu, cuma teringat. "

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    Replies
    1. Bila teringat, bukankah perasaan rindu itu turut hadir? hee

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  11. I can't write as beautiful as that. Tabek you.

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    Replies
    1. I'm speechless.. haha.. Thank you.. Well I don't really focus on my words that night.. I just wrote anything that appeared in my mind.. But still, thanks Adam.. :3

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    2. This's what nurul wrote, "Hurtfully true but still beautiful"

      Agree sangat

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    3. Ohh.. I thought the bottom part.. haha.. Thanks Adam..

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  12. Replies
    1. Agreeing on which term? Hoping that I would write something in a happier mode? haha

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  13. Beautiful poem. Boleh baca apa yang tersirat di hati Anis :)

    I guess you already moving on, kan? :D

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Siqah.. Yeah I do.. I am moving on.. :D

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  14. Too young too dumb to realize.. That I should buy you flowers :'( haihhhhh.. Touching hmmm

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    Replies
    1. *hulur tisu* It's never too late to buy the flowers.. haha

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  15. Reading this again tonight... suddenly I feel like crazy. Haih, I am so fragile lately!

    Honestly I don't want to change my past as all the things I've been through in the past make the person I am now. But, the first 3 paragraphs are kind of close to my heart, right now.

    I just want to create new happy memories now and in the future.

    hanisamanina.com

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  16. Aww.. Well I don't want to change my past either but somehow, those sort of questions do crossed my mind..

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